The U of I Summer Writing Festival is over and now I have to reacclimate to the full day writing life. Being that active takes me away from my novels. I am actually somewhat of an introvert. Signing up and taking classes with other people is actually me pushing myself to interact 'because its good for me'. It is exhausting! Ann Marrow Lindberg said: “The most exhausting thing in life, I have discovered, is being insincere. That is why so much of social life is exhausting; one is wearing a mask. I have shed my mask.”
I too have shed my mask as I return to a more secluded writing day. Don't get me wrong, I'm a Humanist, I love people. I chose the Altruistic path a long time ago. But, there is the negative side to everything. That is how life balances. So, there is always the bullshit. The baggage that people bring with them and insecurity shall saturate the ground where they stand. I a had particular tough week long class back in July and it was just full of that. It brought toxicity to a whole new height. I am too used to freedom. Time to withdraw, lick my wounds and reflect on the positive. Delving back into fiction will help me do that. Slainte.

As of 9:00am this morning, I have published novel #4
'When Walls Fall Down'.
Twelves years in the making, along with tons of travel and research, I bring you an action romance that will take you from the high street of Ballyahmras, Ireland to the back streets of Berlin, at a time when Germany is in the throes of Glasnost and Perestroika. An ever changing scenery as a back drop to two young lovers in a fight for their lives. Find it at Amazon.com, published under  the ever jovial and altruistic author, C.F. McDaeid. Slainte!

After almost twelve years of writing, rewriting. taking out, putting in. Traveling abroad for research, getting the feel for the countries where it takes place, interviewing good people (and some bad) I have finally had enough of this piece and in order to send it on its way--I am self publishing: When Walls Fall Down, an Action-Adventure Romance. I will be so glad when its gone. An author knows that when they start to hate the characters they created, its time to say goodbye and let them move out on their own. GOODBYE! (and its I who won't forget to write--a new novel that is!)

The trees are flowering and the Greenman has cometh. The Dark Days have waned and I will put winter out of my mind until I can no longer (Oct.31?). A week off as I tend my yard and garden. It will be difficult, for all I will think about is getting back to my written words and the worlds within. Slainte!

The sun is rising sooner-the day grows longer. Novel #8 is coming together quite nicely and novel #4 is going through its final proofreading before make its way to self-publishing platform. Rejections flow in like cockroaches into an empty apartment for short stories submitted and new ideas for more, pile up in my head-I don't care. I write for myself. if you ever get the chance, watch the film, 'Finding Forrester' with Rob Brown and Sean Connery. Understand Forrester-you understand me. That is all! Slainte!

January to me is the 'Dead Month' The coldest time of year for us here in the Midwest with, no readings, no open mics, no workshops--nothing. But, the best month for reading and tea drinking--together. A robe, a couch a good novel and a hot cup. Of course I will also be writing. Nothing beats writing. Eight novels down and none of them published. Think I'll try to get at least on the market--maybe in a couple days, though. The process kind of interrupts  my writing--jumping through publishers hoops isn't writing. It's anguishing. As a child, 'Once Upon A Time...' was something to look forward to, as an old man, it is the same. Except, now I am the story teller--to myself!

So busy writing-no time for blogging. Decided to really push to get one of eight novels published. I suspect another year will pass before that time... Farewell, til then

Look how long its been since I blogged last! Okay, now that you've looked-go do something productive! :D
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Workshops... I workshop a great deal. They keep me in touch. Otherwise, I might fall off the edge of the world. Figuratively of course (I know the world is not flat). The problem with Workshopping is, well... there are a lot of things that are wrong with workshopping. Its supposed to be an educational moment, always keep that in mind. Keep an open mind.
When one leaves their writing confines and comes out into the real world (reality?), you leave your Creativity Freedom behind. It is like you have now been boxed up.
You are with several other people who are also in that box and in order for the instructor (who is also a writer, but considered to be a better writer) to instruct. You all need to be on the same page. Now, I'm not saying there is no creativity. Creative moments come in workshop when you are given an exercise and you are unleashed for 10, maybe 15 minutes to write something prompted. Then back in the box for organized sharing.
​I have to admit though, something happens to you during this period of time, whether it be for a weekend, a weeklong, or longer. I can't really explain it. Maybe it was that--out of all that crap that was spewed during that time period, someone said something that changed how you viewed some element of writing. Of the storytelling.
Then you are released from the box at the close. You return to your creative space. Away from the group. Away from the classroom. With you, came that one little thing that you are now going to be able to use. That one little obscure thing that can't be seen until someone who reads your stuff notices the change in your words upon some page that you diligently slaved over. Then your work blossoms. Like a flower that last year was only pink, but this year it emerged with its petals laced in crimson.
​There was evolution. There was growth. One little thing that changed, everything.

I have often entered writing contests. Mostly at my own expense. I have never won, or became 2nd or 3rd place. Always the kindly rejection notice. Sometimes the, "Well, you were one of the finalists, but..."

​This is, technically, writing for the market with a financial cost. Still, a slap in the face and one of the worst because you paid a fee. Yet, because I, as many others did, basically stood in a line, expecting just that. Its masochistic.
​So, never again.

​Rejection is hard enough to take without actually paying money for it. You have to deal with the tough skin rule that is so blatantly conveyed if you want to be published. So, yes, I will query and submit, going for the thick skin--just not with the 'All skin penetrating blade' that comes with paying fees.